TALL TALES

Tension mounted when at last the baby arrived. It was a relief (and to some a disappointment), when the baby was born completely normal. But a few moments later, before their terrified eyes, the child began to change. The room erupted with screams as the child grew at an enormous rate, becoming taller than a man and changing into a beast which resembled a dragon, with a head like a horse, a snake-like body and bat's wings. 

As soon as it was full-grown, the monster began beating all the woman (including his mother) with its thick, forked tail. With a harsh cry, it flew through the chimney and vanished into the storm.

The Monster of Leeds, or the Jersey Devil as he was later called, still haunts the pines of New Jersey, wrecking havoc upon farmer's crops and livestock, poisoning pools and creeks, and appearing on the Jersey shore just before a ship wreck. 
 
 

Cowboys in Heaven 
After cow punching for nigh on fifty years, a Texas cowboy went on to his reward. There was considerable excitement in heaven when he reached the pearly gates. The arrival of a real Texan cowboy was considered something of an event in heaven. Saint Peter himself came right over and insisted on giving the cowpoke a tour. Things were right friendly-like until the cowboy spotted half-a-dozen cowpokes staked out like broncos. 

"Why are all those men staked out?" he asked Saint Peter.

Saint Peter replied: "Those are cowboys from the Panhandle. Every time we let them loose, they try to go back to Texas!" 
 
 

Mississippi Mosquitoes
A visitor to Mississippi decided to take a walk along the river in the cool of the evening. His host warned him that the mosquitoes in the area had been acting up lately, tormenting the alligators until they moved down the river. But the visitor just laughed and told his host he wasn't to be put off from his evening constitutional by a few mosquitoes.

As he promenaded beside the flowing Mississippi, he heard the whirling sound of a tornado. Looking up, he saw two mosquitoes descend upon him. They lifted him straight up in the air and carried him out over the river.

"Shall we eat him on the bank or in the swamp?" he heard one ask the other.

"We'd better eat him on the bank," said the other. "Or else the big mosquitoes in the swamp will take him away from us."

Frightened near to death, the man lashed out at the mosquitoes until they lost their grip and dropped him into the river. He was carried two miles downstream before he was fished out by a riverboat pilot. The man left Mississippi the next day, and has never gone for another walk from that day to this.
 
 

Pecos Bill Rides a Tornado
Now everyone in the West knows that Pecos Bill could ride anything. No bronco could throw him, no sir! Fact is, I only heard of Bill getting' throwed once in his whole career as a cowboy. Yep, it was that time he was up Kansas way and decided to ride him a tornado. 

Now Bill wasn't gonna ride jest any tornado, no ma'am. He waited for the biggest gol-durned tornado you ever saw. It was turning the sky black and green, and roaring so loud it woke up the farmers away over in China. Well, Bill jest grabbed that there tornado, pushed it to the ground and jumped on its back. The tornado whipped and whirled and sidewinded and generally cussed its bad luck all the way down to Texas. Tied the rivers into knots, flattened all the forests so bad they had to rename one place the Staked Plains. But Bill jest rode along all calm-like, give it an occasional jab with his spurs. 

Finally, that tornado decided it wasn't getting this cowboy off its back no-how. So it headed west to California and jest rained itself out. Made so much water it washed out the Grand Canyon. That tornado was down to practically nothing when Bill finally fell off. He hit the ground so hard it sank below sea level. Folks call the spot Death Valley. 

Anyway, that's how rodeo got started. Though most cowboys stick to broncos these days.
 
 

Healthy Climate
California must be the healthiest state in the union, yes sir! I know of one chap who's grandfather lived to be 200 years old. The old man got awful tired of living after awhile, but couldn't seem to sicken and die. 

Finally, his relatives tactfully suggested he try traveling away from California. And sure enough, it worked. The old man took sick not long after leaving and died. 

It was part of his last request that they bury him in California; so his heir had his body shipped home. But wouldn't you know it, as soon as he crossed the border into California, the old man revived and rose right out of his coffin, as spry as ever. His heir suggested more travel, but the old man decided to stick it out until his time came. 

*Above tall tales re-told by S. E. Schlosser
 

The Story of Paul Bunyan
Paul Bunyan was the biggest baby ever born to the world! He was too big to fit inside the house, so his father built him a cradle to put in the water. As Baby Paul slept in the water cradle, his father followed alongside it in a boat so he could keep an eye on him. When Baby Paul began to snore, his father thought the noise was coming from an approaching thunderstorm!

When Paul Bunyan grew up, he decided to become a lumberjack, because he could fell an entire forest with one swing of his axe. The other lumberjacks were glad for his help, since he made their work so much easier. They did have to feed him an awful lot, though. Paul Bunyan loved to eat, especially pancakes. One day, a woman came into the logging camp kitchen and asked the cook, "Why are those logs over there piled up to the ceiling?"

"Those aren't logs," the cook replied. "Those are sausages for Paul Bunyan."

One day, during a heavy snowstorm, Paul Bunyan was out walking and bumped into a mountain. When he looked down, he saw two blue ears sticking out of the snow. He yanked on the ears and pulled up a baby blue ox. He decided to keep the ox and took it home with him. The next day, the snow had melted and Paul Bunyan saw that the baby ox had eaten three entire fields of hay! This was going to be one big ox, for sure. Paul Bunyan called the ox "Babe" and the two of them became fast friends.

Well, Babe got so big that when he and Paul Bunyan walked around Minnesota, they formed ten thousand lakes with their footprints. Minnesota has been known ever since as the 'Land of Ten Thousand Lakes.'